{"id":99,"date":"2017-09-07T20:55:31","date_gmt":"2017-09-08T01:55:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/?p=99"},"modified":"2017-09-15T12:50:43","modified_gmt":"2017-09-15T17:50:43","slug":"leadership-the-power-of-listening","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/leadership-the-power-of-listening\/","title":{"rendered":"Leadership: The Power of Listening"},"content":{"rendered":"

Great leaders are great listeners. <\/span><\/p>\n

They listen more than they talk. <\/span>They recognize knowledge and wisdom are not gained by talking, but by listening. As leaders it is important to accept that good communication is not a one-way street. In fact, the first rule in communication is to seek understanding before seeking to be understood. <\/span><\/p>\n

Studies show that <\/span>the average person listens with only <\/span>25 percent efficiency<\/span><\/a>\u2014meaning there\u2019s <\/span>a lot<\/span><\/i> we\u2019re letting go in one ear and out the other!<\/span>[1] <\/span>Take a moment to reflect on your leadership, how are you doing with listening? What might your co-workers say about your listening capacity?<\/span><\/p>\n

Lessons in good listening<\/h3>\n

The charter text for Christian listening might be James 1:19: \u201c<\/span>Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.\u201d<\/span><\/i> (ESV) <\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s simple enough in principle, and nearly impossible to live. Too often we are slow to hear, quick to speak, and quick to anger. So, learning to listen well won\u2019t happen overnight. It requires discipline, effort, and intentionality. You get better with time, they say. <\/span>[2]<\/span> If this is an area of your life and ministry that you know needs to improve, here are five lessons in good listening.<\/span><\/p>\n

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  1. Good listening requires patience<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Janet Dunn in her article \u201c<\/span>How to Become a Good Listener<\/span><\/i>\u201d states:<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u201c<\/span><\/i>Many of us are too preoccupied with ourselves when we listen. Instead of concentrating on what is being said, we are busy either deciding what to say in response or mentally rejecting the other person\u2019s point of view.\u201d<\/span><\/i> [2]<\/span><\/p>\n

    Good listening requires concentration and patience. It means listening without an impatience to speak and hearing the other person out till they\u2019re done speaking. But it\u2019s hard! Perhaps we \u201cknow\u201d what they are going to say, we have another commitment, or we were in the middle of something else when they started talking. Either way it takes energy and patience to block out our human tendencies and inclinations to interrupt and to extend grace in our listening. <\/span>[2]<\/span><\/p>\n

      \n
    1. Good listeners are present<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      Being mindful in conversations is a trademark characteristic of a good listener. Paul Sacco, assistant professor at the University of Maryland School of Social Work notes when you\u2019re fully aware in the moment, you\u2019re more likely to retain what you\u2019re hearing and respond with more authenticity.<\/span> [1] <\/span>A good listener focuses fully on the person in front them, blocking out all of the distractions that constantly bombards them and focuses on what\u2019s being said. Being present as a listener gives worth to the person speaking and communicates to them that what they are saying is valuable and important.<\/span><\/p>\n

        \n
      1. Good listeners ask good questions<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

        Part of active listening isn\u2019t just lending your ear but also asking appropriate follow-up questions that draw out more information. This ability to provide thought-provoking feedback is one of the best ways to show you\u2019re engaged in what the other person has to say. Good questions don\u2019t interrogate or pry into something that the person doesn\u2019t want to share. Rather, we humbly draw them out and point them towards fresh perspectives through careful but genuine questions. <\/span>[2]<\/span><\/p>\n

          \n
        1. Good listening is an act of love<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

          Dietrich Bonheoffer says half-eared listening, \u201c<\/span>despises the brother and is only waiting for a chance to speak and thus get rid of the other person.<\/span><\/i>\u201d Poor listening rejects; good listening embraces. Poor listening diminishes the other person, while good listening invites them to exist, and to matter. Bonhoeffer writes, \u201c<\/span>Just as love to God begins with listening to his Word, so the beginning of love for the brethren is learning to listen to them.<\/span><\/i>\u201d <\/span>[2]<\/span><\/p>\n

          Good listening flows from a humble heart that counts others more significant than ourselves (Philippians 2:3). It looks not only to its own interests, but also the interests of others (Philippians 2:4). It goes hand in hand with the mindset of Christ (Philippians 2:5). It is patient and kind (1 Corinthians 13:4). <\/span>[2]<\/span><\/p>\n

            \n
          1. Good listening is ministry<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

            According to Bonhoeffer, there are many times when \u201c<\/span>listening can be a greater service than speaking.<\/span><\/i>\u201d As Christian ministry leaders, there will be days when the most important ministry we do is square our shoulders to some hurting person, uncross our arms, lean forward, make eye contact, and hear their pain all the way to the bottom. <\/span>[2]<\/span><\/p>\n

            Good listening doesn\u2019t mean coming with answers, but rather affirming and being a channel of love and compassion. Often times in our listening God uses us to speak and reflect the kindness and love that He wants that person to know. At times what our neighbor, staff, ministry co-workers etc. \u00a0needs most is simply for someone to listen. <\/span><\/p>\n

            Great listeners are rare!<\/b><\/p>\n

            Research shows that there is a direct correlation between strong leadership and strong listening skills. As we seek to be the leaders our ministries need, let\u2019s not forget to prioritize our listening and to be a conduit through which God continues to pour His grace into our lives and into the lives of others. In my opinion, great talkers are everywhere, but great listeners are a rare commodity. Will you join me in asking God to cultivate a patient, present heart towards those around us? A listening ear that asks good questions, loves others, and serves our neighbor?<\/span><\/p>\n

            Growth Point<\/span>:<\/span><\/p>\n

            Great leaders intentionally seek to be compassionate, present, and attentive listeners.<\/span><\/p>\n

            Scripture Point<\/span>:<\/span><\/p>\n

            Read Proverbs 18:13. What does this verse say about the act of listening well?<\/span><\/p>\n

            Action Point:<\/span><\/p>\n

            Ask a trusted co-worker or spouse if you are a good listener. Express to them your desire to listen better and ask them to remind you this week to be patient, present, and grace-filled in your listening. <\/span><\/p>\n

            [1]<\/span> http:\/\/www.huffingtonpost.com\/2014\/08\/14\/habits-of-good-listeners_n_5668590.html<\/span><\/a><\/h6>\n
            [2]<\/span> http:\/\/www.desiringgod.org\/articles\/six-lessons-in-good-listening<\/span><\/a><\/h6>\n
            http:\/\/hub.n2growth.com\/the-power-of-listening\/<\/span><\/h6>\n
            Photo by\u00a0Joel Mwakasege<\/a>\u00a0on\u00a0Unsplash<\/a><\/h6>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

            Great leaders are great listeners. They listen more than they talk. They recognize knowledge and wisdom are not gained by talking, but by listening. As leaders it is important to accept that good communication is not a one-way street. In fact, the first rule in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":15,"featured_media":100,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-99","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-leadership-skills"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/15"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=99"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":102,"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99\/revisions\/102"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/100"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=99"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=99"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/reconciledworld.org\/flourish\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=99"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}