“Self-care” is a frequently used term today. While there is a good chance you have heard it, do you have any ideas what it means? Or better yet, do you know why is it significant for you to understand and practice in your life as a ministry leader?
I asked an expert (Google) about the practices of self-care and this is what I found. One way to define self-care is:
The active and powerful choice to engage in the activities that are required to gain or maintain an optimal level of overall health.[1]
Along with a working definition there came thousands of suggested activities like:
- A leisurely walk in the park
- Riding a bike for exercise
- A stress-free activity like putting a puzzle together or flying a kite.
- An exotic vacation
- Taking a nap
- Eating your daily-recommended allowance of vegetables.
All kind of suggestions came… and all of them are correct in some way shape or form. But what does the Bible tell us about this topic? Is it important and does it impact your ability to flourish in ministry?
The Bible and doing
In the Bible we are called to be doers of good works and justice. Micah 6:8 for example says: “Do justly, love mercy and walk humbly with God.” James 2:14 asks: “What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them?”
But what happens when the doing leaves us drained and exhausted?
It doesn’t take long to see that the world is full of brokenness. As Christians who have experienced the grace of God, our response is to do what we can to bring healing. Thus, we work to bring justice, to feed the poor, and to mobilize others to care for the lonely and broken-hearted. Yet sometimes we can get so caught up in doing that we forget to care for our own bodies, minds and spirits. Sometimes our service leaves us utterly exhausted, with little room to be in relationship with ourselves. We are left with little to give and our lives and ministries ultimately suffer.
A real life example
Recently, I talked with a ministry colleague that was increasingly consumed with leading and filling every need of his church ministry. He was working hours upon hours trying to meet every request. He wasn’t sleeping well, neglected exercise and was extremely stressed. In the midst of his extreme fatigue he came down with a simple, common illness but his body was unable to fight it off. In his state of exhaustion he found himself in bed for nearly two weeks, completely away from his ministry, trying to fight off the common sickness. The reality check for him was humbling. He returned to work with a healthier plan to delegate work, rest and care for his body. As a result his new self-care plan has allowed him to better lead his ministry and care for those God has placed under his leadership.
The command to self-care
Jesus proclaimed the greatest commandments to be: “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:37-39). You might not realize it, but these words point us to the heart of good self-care.
Dr. Gary Smalley in his book “The DNA of Relationships” insightfully points out: “What we see here is Jesus telling us to value God above all else. But in the same breath, Jesus also teaches us to highly value our neighbor in the same way that He expects us to highly value ourselves, as God’s very special creations. Jesus assumes that we want the best for ourselves; that’s how He created us. He instructs us to pursue the best interests of others with the same energy that we pursue our own best interests.” [2]
When you love God with every part of your being, He fills you up to overflowing with His amazing love. Out of that overflow, you give to others. This is the balanced life, a life worth living.
But notice something crucial: If you don’t take care of yourself, you have no overflow. In other words, you can’t give what you don’t possess. Without an overflow, you will find it hard to take care of others—and almost impossible to obey Jesus’ command.
If you and I want a healthy flourishing ministry we must find balance. We must recognize the intrinsic call to self-care that exists in the greatest commandments of Jesus. We must love God and love others with the same energy that we love ourselves. [2]
It’s only when you allow your cup to be filled that you can fill the cup of others. If you have nothing in your cup, you can’t give anything away!
How effective is your self-care plan?
Take a moment to consider how well you take care of yourself? Do you prioritize rest, eating well, and regular exercise? Are you routinely finding time to connect with God on a personal level through worship, reading the Bible, and prayer? Are you giving yourself space to participate in stress-free activities that allow you to recharge and re-energize? How would you evaluate your self-care plan?
Leading a ministry is really tough. There is certainly no shortage of stress, decision-making, and fear that you face daily. If we want to honor God in our ministry, we must learn to minister out of our overflow and not our shortage. After all, we can’t give what we don’t possess.
* If you need help talking through your ideas for self-care, please let me know. I would be happy to help you reflect and consider what a good balance looks like for you.
** In the next newsletter I will give some practical suggestions for pursuing biblical self-care
Growth Point:
What you impart has to be yours before you give it away.
Scripture Point:
Take a moment and do a quick verse study on Jesus and self-care. What do you learn from Jesus’s actions? (Read: Matthew 14:23, John 6:15, Matthew 21:18, John 4:7, Mark 15:41)
Action Point:
“A dry well can’t give water.” What are 3 practical steps you can take this week to ensure you keep filling your well; to ensure that you are able to give what God is calling you to give?
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